Archive for the ‘Caregiver Support’ Category
Posted on November 22, 2011 - by Nurse Virginia
CAREGIVERS ARE AT RISK FOR DEVELOPING DIABETES AND DEMENTIA
Grace was so stressed by taking care of her husband Frank that she was beginning to have health issues of her own. Frank by all accounts was a “handful.” Frank had Alzheimer’s disease. He was in the early stage and still able to dress and bathe independently. But, because he had such a lack of safety awareness, poor judgment and reasoning skills, Grace felt she was living her life always on duty, always on watch, and on the alert.
Grace felt this constant stress was taking its toll on her health. And current research says that Grace is probably right. Cargivers of persons with dementia are themselves more likely to have cognitive problems and even develop diabetes.
But what they have found out is that it is the lifestyle of being a caregiver that leads to disease.
Lifestyle choices that lead to disease:
- Lack of physical activity. John joined a fitness club when his wife Doris was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. John’s goal was to stay physically fit so that he could care for Doris and keep her home with him. The exercise not only kept him physically strong, but gave him some much needed time away from home to recharge mentally as well.
- Eating fast food and high fat diets. Sometimes it is just too much stress, to do one more thing. And in this age of fast and unhealthy choices it is all too easy to just grab something. Research is showing that this change in older caregivers is causing an increase in cases of diabetes.
- Putting off their health concerns in order to take care of their loved one. The caregiver is more than likely to rush to the doctor for a health concern involving their loved one. But when it comes to taking that same time for them, they feel it can wait.
- Living with constant stress will cause constant release of cortisol and you start to notice that the caregiver is gaining weight. Increased stress and poor food choices lead not only to increased insulin but an increase in inflammation as well. Type 2 diabetes and inflammation are directly related to a cognitive decline.
- Many caregivers become more and more isolated as the disease progresses. While the elder with the disease has fewer and fewer social outlets and contacts the caregiver feels the same isolation and feelings of, going it alone.
Caregivers need to balance their time between taking care of themselves as well as their loved one with Alzheimer’s disease.
Life choices that lead to a long-healthy life:
Taking time to exercise, eat balanced/healthy meals, keep in touch with family and friends, continue interests and activities that reduce stress and have regular check-ups with your physician.
Virginia Garberding, R.N.
Director of Education, The Wealshire, Lincolnshire, Illinois
Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignity and Relevance
Posted on November 17, 2011 - by Nurse Virginia
A CAREGIVER’S MISSION STATEMENT
Writing a life Mission Statement.
When you are hired for a new job, the first thing the company does is give you a copy of their mission statement. The mission statement will contain the purpose of the organization, aims of the organization, and states who the involved parties are – the clients or customers.
McDonald’s mission statement says: “To provide the fast food customer food prepared in the same high-quality manner world-wide that is tasty, reasonably priced and delivered consistently in a low-key décor and friendly atmosphere.”
Starbucks has a straight forward, simple and direct mission: “We inspire and nurture the human spirit –one person, one cup, and one neighborhood at a time.”
Google’s mission statement goes: “We organize the world’s information and make it universally accessible and useful.”
Thinking about the role of caregiver, a personal mission statement could borrow a little bit for each of these. A mission statement for Donna, George’s wife and caregiver might read as follows:
“My mission is to spend time each day on the internet searching the world’s information on Alzheimer’s disease, in order to find the latest information and incorporate those things I find useful into George’s care. I want to care for George in a high-quality manner always striving for consistency so George can feel the comfort of routine. I want to inspire George every day to be the best he can be, nurture him so that he always feels secure, in a low-key and always friendly atmosphere, one day at a time.”
A mission statement helps the individual to focus and remember their goals, when they might get a little off the track, when life happens.
Virginia Garberding R.N.
Director of Education, The Wealshire, Lincolnshire, Illinois
Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignity and Relevance
Posted on November 15, 2011 - by Nurse Virginia
TAKE CARE OF THE CAREGIVER AS WELL AS THE ELDER THE WAY THE NURSING HOME DOES – GET A ELECTRIC BED AND GREAT MATTRESS
A great bed will be a fully electric bed. A bed that goes very low to the floor as well as elevates to waist height for the comfort of the caregiver. When the bed can go low, close to the floor, the elder is less at risk for falls out of bed and less at risk for injury. A bed that can be positioned very low is looked at as the “ultimate in safety” for an elder.
The ability for the bed to rise to waist height reduces the amount of stooping the caregiver will be doing, over the bed during times of direct care. Many times back injuries are caused by stooping for long periods of time. And it is very difficult to care for an adult while you are stooping. It is so much better to be able to raise the area of care giving to a level that is comfortable.
The ability to raise and lower the head and foot increases the elder’s ability to get into a comfortable position. Sometimes even a slight change in these areas may reduce pressure on the elder’s bony places that are prone to bed sores/skin ulcers.
The mattress is also a significant line of defense against skin breakdown and bed sores. When I have had to go to look at nursing facilities for family members, one of the first things I do is pull back the covers on the beds to take a look at their mattresses.
Choose a mattress with an extra soft heel zone to prevent skin breakdown on heels, as well as a mattress for pressure relief, comfort, durability and is easy to clean. Make sure it has a firm edge around the mattress to prevent the elder from sliding off the bed when sitting on the edge during dressing and undressing.
If you cannot invest in a new bed and mattress an inexpensive alternative will be a “mattress overlay.” That is usually a combination of one or more layers of foam and a layer of a water-like, non-toxic gel. The gel layer goes closest to the elder’s body.
Buying a bed is really an area where you can realize the value of spending money proactively. The right bed and right mattress will prevent against real pain, on the part of the caregiver by sparing their back from injury. And the elder who has increased comfort, a reduced risk of falls as well as skin breakdown.
Virginia Garberding R.N.
Director of Education, The Wealshire, Lincolnshire, Illinois
Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignity and Relevance
Posted on October 25, 2011 - by Nurse Virginia
WHEN TAKING CARE OF A CONFUSED ELDER – DO WHAT THE NURSING HOME DOES – FORM A COMMITTEE
(Book Excerpt)
It can’t be that hard, people in healthcare do it all the time.
You cope the best you can. After all, it’s your sister, your mom, your friend, your fiancée and you want to be a good daughter, friend, lover, husband. You tell yourself it’s only until they get better. It can’t be tougher than your job, your husband’s moods, raising three kids. Doctors and nurses do it all the time. But you discover it’s more demanding than you think.
Taking care of someone you love is different from taking care of someone as a healthcare professional. Not only do you have to stretch your own life in a hundred different ways, but you’re losing the support of someone who was once there for you. Not only are you confronting someone else’s fears about pain, death, disease and decline but you are confronting your own.
You’re exhausted after taking them to the doctor. They want to talk over every grim detail and you don’t want to hear it. You find yourself going blank when a radiologist is talking to you. You don’t seem to be able to set limits on how much time you’ll spend on their health problems.
Your emotional swings are as manic as theirs.
One minute you hate them and the next you feel closer to them than ever before. On the one hand, you resent them for taking so much out of you and on the other you feel good about being so needed, honored to be doing something so meaningful.
The illness drags on. You run from work to the hospital or checking on them at home. Chronically sleep deprived, you snap at your family, forget to pick up the dog, lose your car keys. You feel totally responsible, guilty, embarrassed at your own fears and your own inability to talk about them, or even to tell the sick person how much you love him or her.
(Book excerpt) Share The Care by Cappy Capossela and Sheila Warnock – Simon & Schuster
You are drowning. I have seen so many people who have tried to go it alone, to the point of not telling family members who live away what their true circumstances are. What they need is what we have at a nursing community – help, support, team work. Share The Care helps the individual create that support group, so they no longer have to do it alone.
Virginia Garberding R.N.
Director of Education, The Wealshire, Lincolnshire, Illinois
Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignity and Relevance
Posted on October 13, 2011 - by Nurse Virginia
WHEN CAREGIVING FOR THE ELDERLY – HOW TO AVOID BACK PROBLEMS
Working in a stooped (bending forward and down) position often results in back pain. Being a caregiver can mean constant stooping. If you are taking care of one elderly person or many, much of your time caregiving, is spend bending forward from the waist and bending down. When you are standing straight the stress on your discs and ligaments of your lower back are considerably lower than when you are bending forward. But the tasks involved with caregiving usually involve bending and stooping.
Lower back pain affects nearly everyone at some time of their life. But for the direct caregiver it is almost a given that you will experience a back problem unless you prepare for the burden placed on your back.Caregiving involves bending over beds, assisting the elder to dress, bathing, possibly changing an incontinence product and assisting the elder’s transfer from bed to wheelchair, to dining room chair, and possibly a recliner.
While working in a stooped posture, you are most likely to experience back problems in the first 4 – 5 hours of the day. The discs in the spinal column take up fluid while we rest at night, these are the shock absorbers of the spine and the area where we experience a bulge when injured. So while these discs are holding more fluid you would want to be especially cautious of injury.
To prevent back injury the caregiver needs to spend some time doing extension exercises before bending and stressing those discs. Extension (bending backward) is the opposite of flexion (bending forward). Extension can be accomplished by simply bending backward 5-6 times at frequent intervals during care. Extension can also be accomplished by standing in an open doorway with your hands on the door frame and pushing forward while you arc your back.
Doing core strengthening exercises can further protect the caregiver’s back from injury. A great and easy core strengthening exercise is the Kettlebell. (Easily found-google Kettlebell) A cheap alternative can be made with a shopping back and a large can.
If you already are experiencing some back pain order 7 Steps to a Pain-Free Life, How to Rapidly Relieve Back and Neck Pain by Robin McKenzie with Craig Kubey published by the Penguin Group, New York.
Virginia Garberding R.N.
Director of Education, The Wealshire, Lincolnshire, Illinois
Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignity and Relevance
Posted on September 29, 2011 - by Nurse Virginia
WHEN THE CAREGIVER NEEDS HELP – CREATING A CARING COMMUNITY
When Dorothy was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. So many people offered those comforting words to her husband Don, “Let me know what I can do to help.” People at their church – when they witnessed Dorothy’s struggle, or friends and family when they learned the diagnosis said the same comforting words, “Let me know what I can do to help.”
Yet day after day Don sat in his home with Dorothy, feeling very much alone with his daily challenges. Many people honestly wanted to help but they just didn’t know what kind of help was needed or wanted. Many people expressed the feeling that they didn’t want to intrude.
When you are living in “crisis mode” it truly is just too much to even make a call to that kind neighbor who made the offer of a home cooked meal and schedule it.
Now there is a great site where they will guide you through all the steps to create a caring community to fit your needs. Whether it is:
- Military and Veterans families
- Eldercare and Long-term Living
- Volunteering
- Parenting
- Schools
- Religious Groups
- Care giving
You might need help with meals, laundry, cleaning or maybe elder sitting so you can run some errands. The tools are there to create your community – calendars, support sources, examples and it’s all free.
Virginia Garberding R.N.
Director of Education, The Wealshire, Lincolnshire, Illinois
Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignity and Relevance
www.pleasegettoknowme.com
Posted on May 11, 2011 - by Nurse Virginia
National Nurses Week 2011 – FIVE TRAITS THAT MAKE A NURSE OR ANYONE ELSE GREAT
I just read an article called the 5 things that make a good nurse. In reading the list I realized these 5 things would be good traits in anyone, especially anyone caring for an elder.
5 – Traits that make a great caregiver:
- Compassion – the ability to really see you’re elder and take action. Whether it is providing pain relief because you know the elder so well that you know when they are agitated they are in pain. Or the caregiver who realizes the elder is upset because they just can’t make any sense out of the environment or their situation, and the caregiver provides a comforting presence. The caregiver that realizes this isn’t what that elder wanted for themselves or expected in their life.
- Empathy – The Oxford Dictionary defines sympathy as sorrow at someone else’s misfortune – however empathy is the ability to share and understand another’s feelings. I remember a day many years ago when I needed to “call-in” to work. Something I rarely did, but it was worth it for the words my Director of Nursing said to me that day that have stayed with me. When I explained that my arthritic knee was acting up to the point that I quite literally couldn’t stand, she said, “My knee hurts for yours.” That was empathy. Instead of saying “I’m so sorry you hurt, she said “I hurt for you.”
- Selflessness – putting someone else and their concerns above your own. The private caregiver who just can’t go home on time because her elder isn’t doing well today. The caregiver who misses meals and hardly dashes away for a bathroom break.
- Self-aware – knowing your strengths and weaknesses is important in a caregiver. No one is great at everything, knowing when you need to call for help doesn’t indicate weakness it shows self-awareness. Knowing when you need to step back and take a break is strength.
- Thirst for knowledge – new ways to care for the elderly are discovered every day. Becoming part of a support group and attending educational opportunities to learn about new approaches for different disease processes, promotes better care. Sharing with other caregivers also rejuvenates the caregiver. A person who is always seeking new information is never a dull person.
Virginia Garberding, R.N.
Director of Education, The Wealshire, Lincolnshire, Illinois
Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignity and Relevance
Posted on April 21, 2011 - by Nurse Virginia
WHEN YOU ARE TAKING CARE OF THE DEMANDING ELDER A REAL CHANCE TO BE CHRIST LIKE – RE-VISITED
ONE OF THE MOST READ BOLGS ON THIS SITE – ONCE AGAIN FOR EASTER
The call light went off, and the argument started. “You go”,”No I went last time,” “You go,” and so it went every shift. Lois was a very demanding person to care for, once you went in that room you knew you wouldn’t be out for some time.
10 things to keep in mind when taking care of the demanding elder:
- Don’t take anything personally, it really isn’t about you. It is about a personality that was formed many years ago and isn’t going to change now. This is a wonderful opportunity to be Christ like in showing the elder patience.
- Get to know the elder, their likes and dislikes so you can meet their needs before they ask.
- Be the good listener the elder is looking for – this might not be the person you would chose to be special to – but the elder may surprise you.
- Give the demanding elder as much control in the everyday decisions as possible.
- Be a good observer; see if you can identify some of the triggers that cause the demanding behavior.
- Be very clear in your communication and don’t make promises you can’t keep.
- Think about your body language when you care for the elder. Are your expressions and body language saying – I can’t wait to get away from you?
- Smile, when you don’t feel like smiling. Find humor, tell a joke, laugh even if you are the only one laughing. Be happy, don’t let anyone take away your joy.
- Don’t expect changes you make to make a huge difference in the elder’s behavior. The only person you have the control to change is yourself.
- Pray. Take your problems to the one who is always there for you.
The demand doesn’t have to make sense. Lois asked everyone who came in her room to check the temperature. She had a piece of red tape at the exact point the heat/cool unit should be on. No one had a reason to change the temperature but that didn’t stop Lois from asking many times a day to check that temperature, to make sure no one had changed it.
How many times would be too many times for Jesus?
Virginia Garberding, R.N.
Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignity and Relevance
Posted on March 24, 2011 - by Nurse Virginia
ARE YOU CARETAKING OR CAREGIVING – WHEN SOMEONE YOU LOVE HAS AN ADDICTION
(Book Excerpt)
Addiction. It’s a trial we’re never ready to encounter. We can’t believe that a loved one would make such a life-altering mistake by entering into the dark world of drug or alcohol addiction.
When people we love are struggling, we struggle as well. Sometimes we wish that we could fix their lives for them. But we also forget to care for our own needs, both physically and spiritually, during those difficult times.
Caretaking and Caregiving
I never thought of the difference between caretaking and caregiving. I was the former: I’m learning to be the latter.
Caretakers take over for others. They make the decisions. They control. They dominate. They also say, “I’m doing this for your own good,” and they believe their words.
As a caretaker, I felt anxious and guilty and tried to anticipate her needs before she asked. I didn’t mean to do all that. I wanted to help and to show I love her I never planned to take care of her like a nurse.
Caregivers offer their love and help but refuse to do for people what they can do for themselves. They accept responsibility for their own actions and refuse to cover up for a loved one. They support them as they struggle with how to live.
As a caregiver I’m learning to let her do for herself what only she can do. Then I support her decision.
God, You care without caretaking. Help me learn from your example.
Book excerpt from:
When Someone You Love Abuses Drugs or Alcohol, by Cecil Murphey
Beacon Hill Press of Kansas City, Kansas City, Missouri
Virginia Garberding, R.N.
Director of Education, The Wealshire, Lincolnshire, Illinois
Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignity and Relevance
Posted on February 3, 2011 - by Nurse Virginia
GUILT THE GIFT THAT JUST KEEPS GIVING
If you really want to, you don’t have to go too far to find something to feel guilty about. Opportunities abound for all of us to heap loads of guilt on our plate of “guilty conscience.” Feeling guilty is reactive. Try to change your thinking and think about how you can be proactive in the situation.
Guilt Busters
- Don’t be such a perfectionist – perfectionists are destined to be disappointed. Do the best you can and learn to “Let go, Let God.”
- If you are a caregiver of a child or elder – don’t put unrealistic expectations on yourself. There are only so many hours in the day and some of that time needs to be spent on self-care for the caregiver as well.
- Get some physical exercise – it is a proven way to reduce stress. I remember a man who had a caregiver for his wife three days a week. During those times he went to the health club and worked out. His fitness goal was to take care of his wife as long as possible. Instead of feeling guilty because she was with a paid caregiver, this man saw the bigger picture, and saw the need to take care of himself.
- Find someone in your life who is a good listener. Not someone who has a pocketful of advice, but someone who can listen without judging.
- Be realistic. If the person you care for has a progressive and fatal condition, acknowledge that the disease will progress despite your best efforts. Stop concentration on “the cure” and make this moment better. Put your energy into “care and comfort” and take pride in what you do.
- Laughter is the best medicine and if the person you care for has Alzheimer’s disease they can be the best of companions. Where other people will stop and weigh what they say, the person with Alzheimer’s disease will usually share there first observation without reserve. Joining the person “in the moment” can be very relaxing and allow you to see the humor in many situations.
Virginia Garberding, R.N.
Director of Education, The Wealshire, Lincolnshire, Illinois
Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignty and Relevance
- Help support this site by buying my book! Click the link below for details. Thanks!
www.pleasegettoknowme.com
