Archive for April 7th, 2011
Posted on April 7, 2011 - by Nurse Virginia
When a gazelle is grazing they always have heightened awareness – instinct keeps them alert to any sign of danger. But the gazelle isn’t thinking “I better keep a look out, yesterday I remember a pretty brutal looking tiger around here.”
No, the gazelle is in the moment, always ready to bolt at a moment’s notice, but full of worry? No. The gazelle isn’t worried as well about running out of food, or where to sleep tonight.
People on the other hand are full of worries. Many are prisoners of their past, they think the same thoughts day after day. Instead of filling their minds with new ideas, spending time with positive people, reading quality books and articles, thinking positive thoughts, they constantly return to the negative. And their negative thoughts are filled with regrets from the past and worries about the future.
Molly indulged herself in many memories of how her mother had hurt her. Molly often recalled the day she was about eight years old and was on a carnival ride. She was riding a pony and loving it until her Mother started calling out to her. “Hold on Molly, you’re holding the reins wrong,” “Look at how everyone else is doing it,” “Don’t fall off; the way you are sitting you are sure to fall off.”
Even though Molly’s mother had been dead many years, her hurtful words went on in Molly’s mind. Molly relived, in her mind, that short ride so many years ago and how her mother had embarrassed her that day.
Molly became so unsure of herself she could barely drive in her own neighborhood. She could only drive any distance with her husband at the wheel, anyone else driving worried her so, she made herself sick. Molly became afraid of everything; her worries were making her world smaller and smaller.
Molly realized she had developed a real anxiety disorder, and she didn’t want to pass it on to her children. When Molly saw her children could be doing something “better” or her way, she held her tongue and let them learn by doing. She kept her critical thoughts to herself and she didn’t fill her children with worries, just to keep them close to herself.
Molly needed professional help to see what had been done to her; she would never know who had made her mother such a worrier. But this was one legacy she wasn’t passing on.
Christ gave us the best advice about worry see: Matthew 6: 25-34 and Luke 12: 22-34.
Virginia Garberding, R.N.
Director of Education, The Wealshire, Lincolnshire, Illinois
Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignity and Relevance