Posted on January 28, 2010 - by Nurse Virginia

Avoiding Conflict or Episodes of Agitation When The Confused Elder no Longer has Safety Awareness

When the confused elder just doesn’t understand something is dangerous

An elderly person diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease might want to go outside and take a walk. He may not be aware that the temperature is a dangerous 5 degrees, or that there is now 6 inches of new snow.

The best solution is always if you can accompany or join the elder in the activity they want to do, thus making it a safe activity, join them. But many times the caregiver is unable to just drop what they are doing and accompany the elder.

The elderly confused person might not realize they can no longer drive safely.  As a friend just told me, when her family was faced with the same situation. The family put the “club” on the elder’s car. When he went out to the car, of course he was angry, but no longer able to reason out who probably was responsible for this. Eventually he got out of the habit of going out to the car to drive away.  And then became used to having family members take him places.

The elder just no longer had safety awareness and didn’t realize it. He thought  he was just fine and telling him differently or worst saying “No”, “Don’t”, “Don’t do that” or “Don’t go there” would only make things worse.  These warnings will only anger the person who doesn’t know that they are unsafe.

So much kinder to change the subject or cause a distraction

Telling an adult “No” can be very hurtful. It is so much kinder think of something to distract. Especially an activity that the elder enjoys doing.

Direct the attention to yourself, “Boy I am really tired, I am going to sit here for awhile.”

After you cause the distraction, you suggest a pleasant alternative

“I was just going to make a phone call to our son Bob. You haven’t talked to Bob in quite awhile. Why don’t we call him now?”

“I was just thinking of making some cookies, how about giving me a hand?”

Change the subject/cause a distraction/suggest a pleasant alternative.

Virginia Garberding, R.N.

Director of Education, The Wealshire, Lincolnshire, Illinois

Author: Please Get To Know Me – Aging with Dignity and Relevance

www.pleasegettoknowme.com